Mom On the Alert

Strength and Happiness

At some point we all have to take responsibility for our own life.
No one else can make us happy.
It is never really about anyone else.
Abraham Lincoln said it best when he said:
"Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."

I heard this quote from a rather mean sounding radio psychologist many years ago. This woman irritated me tremendously, but I heard the ring of truth those words. Up until that time, I saw myself as a victim, and blamed circumstances and certain people for my basic unhappiness. As the seed of these words started to take root, I started to take more responsibility for my feelings.

The truth was that the blaming was only covering the real problem. Underneath everything else was overwhelming self loathing and self doubt. I thought I needed the approval of others to have any good feelings about myself. But even when this came, the feeling that I was OK was fleeting.

Because every thought word or deed was continually questioned by my negative inner voice, progress toward understanding was thwarted. My ego mind was in charge. I looked outward for what I needed, never realizing that the truth already existed within.

i was told that we must look within ... to see where we have been and where we are. But, in the end, we must see the beauty of our own soul, and begin to give ourselves the love we so desperately crave. No one else can do this for us. It is no one else's responsibility.

While we do the fierce self examination, we must come at the task with a loving heart. We must be kind to ourselves while recognizing our mistakes. We can acknowledge our shortcomings, without beating ourselves up in the process. We can see where we have erred, accept the responsibity for the pain we have caused, where we have hurt and been unkind, without killing our spirit in the process. We can nurture that sad and lonely child that exists within.

We must love. With love comes strength.
With Strength comes the resolve to change.
The change must begin now.

If it will not cause another more pain, we can apologize, but we should expect nothing in return. We cannot do this with any expectation that we will get something back. We should not look for the 'fruit'. We must do this because it is the right thing to do. Then we must move forward.

We will fall many times as we walk this journey of our life. But when we look within, and see the true reality of what is there, we will keep going. Because within each of us exist the one true power. I know the following to be true.

We were all created lovingly out of the Stuff of God.
Everyone. Even you.

.....

I did not come to this understanding on my own.
Someone Dear holds my hand as i travel this path.
THANK YOU!

Posted by Judi at March 2, 2004 9:30 PM | TrackBack